Back to school: supporting your neurodivergent child with transitions

Well, it is August and that means school is just around the corner. It seems like every year, I have good intentions about resetting for school, but somehow they slip through the cracks. Transitioning from summer to school can be hard for any family, but it can be especially hard for neurodivergent children and parents. I want to share some practical tips to ease the transition to school and also for giving yourself grace and kindness when things get tough. 

Start the routine early 

It may seem like three weeks to a month is a long time to start preparing for back to school but for neurodivergent individuals it really isn’t. Starting early and working on building tolerance and endurance for the new routine and schedule means that we don’t end up with meltdowns the first week of school. Start by breaking down your morning routine into sections: wake up, breakfast, getting dressed, getting out the door, etc. Then start practicing each section of the routine. You can start with one section and then add on one at a time helping your child acclimate to the new normal. 

Revamp visuals 

If you or your child have a hard time in the morning, try revamping visual cues to help you move through your morning. First, take stock of your child’s bedroom. Find ways to make picking out clothes easy. I highly recommend pairing outfits together when they get put away or putting things together by color. Children are also more successful if they can see all of their clothes. I tend to gravitate to bins because they are easier. Second, run through the parts of the morning that are hard. Where can you insert a visual to support movement? If breakfast is hard, you can create a choice board of breakfast items (you can even have your child make it). If your child works well with a checklist, you can make one for all the things that need to go into their backpack. 

Don’t overpack the schedule 

There is always a tendency to overfill our schedules, but most neurodivergent children (and adults) really need their downtime. If your child wants to do all the activities, work with them to rank their ideas and only do the top ones. Try to have at least one day where there aren’t any activities. Younger children may need more down time, but talk with your child about when they feel the best. 

Set aside a block  time to do all the back to school tasks 

It is easy to think that we can do all the back to school tasks as they come up, but then life happens. If you can, set aside a block of time in your schedule to run through the things you need to support your child. Rearranging appointments, clothes, supplies, etc. If you have a co-parent ,work together to divide up the tasks. By blocking the time to get these things done, we are more likely to actually do them rather than if they just sit on a list somewhere. 

Recognize you and your child will need time and space 

No matter how much we prep, back to school can be extremely stressful for neurodivergent families. Accepting that both you and your child may have meltdowns and need space will reduce the shame and tension that might arise. Make sure both you and your child have a space you can go to if you need to cool off. Have items or things that can help you take care of yourself. Practice with your child and model taking a break yourself. The more your child sees you taking breaks, the more likely they are to do it themselves. 

If you as a parent would like extra support for yourself, reach out to us to set up a time that wholly belongs to you. If you are looking for support for your child, please reach out to set up an appointment. Our after school slots fill up quickly.